Tuesday, August 17, 2010

The missing present

So the journey was on, 6.10am taxi to Sheffield station, 6.50am train to Birmingham New Street, 8.50am ish train to Aberystwyth and then pick up in Bill's car to Boncath.

I haven't chosen to get up at 5am for a very very long time and it was a somewhat rude awakening but the goal would be worth it. The journey was great, it's a while since I have been far and watching the world wizz past the window was great. It also allowed me to see some of the beautiful countryside that I usually miss as I'm driving down to Wales. Mountains and fields and estuaries filled with various forms of wildlife, from the lowly (worried looking) sheep of the hills and valleys to the herons and little egrets of the rivers and estuaries. Stunning.

Wendy's dad, Bill, was to meet us at Aber station with the girls who were still in the dark about us coming down. They'd been told that they had to do an errand for Uncle Jase and that there was a steam train at Aberystwyth station that they could go and see. I waited on the train as an overexcited Wendy stepped onto the platform expecting to see them but they weren't there so I got off before hoards of people trampled me as they boarded the train. As it happened Bill was only a few minutes away and as Wendy saw his car pull in she charged down the station at top speed causing the station master to hold the train he thought she was late for! I stayed on the platform with the bags and waited.

After the hugs and kisses in the car park Wendy told George that she'd left a present on the platform for her and they had to go back and get it. The girls ran on the platform and were looking for a present, as they ran George looked at me and then looked away, then she did the same again. On the third time she looked I stuck my tongue out at her and smiled. It was such a shout, DADDY, then I heard Carys behind shouting the same daddy daddy daddy. I opened my arms and held my girls tight and we sobbed. The release of emotions flooded over me and I didn't care about anything, just holding those precious little people in my arms was everything at that moment.

We had a great journey down, a bit of traffic and one fool passing in stupid places but other than that it was a car full of excited chatter and laughter. The feeling of relaxation drifting through me as I sat there watching the world go by listening to the girls and their stories and feeling so incredibly lucky.

The luck continued later that day. After a meeting of oncologists and radiologists it had been decided that the areas on my lung which the day before were a cause of concern were NOT a cause for concern. Yes they'd keep their eyes on the areas and monitor them but the decision had been made to carry on with the treatment as it had been planned. The bearer of this news was Debbie the nurse specialist on the other end of the phone. Thank goodness for mobile phones!

It's difficult to convey how it feels when you get good news. This one phone call meant that the lump is responding to treatment. Full stop. No but's and no uncertainties. It was Wendy's face that summed it up for me, it was a mixture of disbelief and happiness and disbelief and happiness and relief and the look of someone having a weight lifted from their shoulders. To me it felt good. As the cancer adverts go on the telly, "today was a good day."


  1. What wonderful news - what a wonderful story - lots of love from The Parkins xx

  2. Hello you just a little on to thank you for such a special day on the beach it was lovely to see you all. Days like that are so very few and far between. Love as always

  3. I have only just started reading your diary as i didnt know about it. I just want to say how incredibly brave you are to be writing down how you feel and what you are going through. I am so pleased for your good news and hope you continue to have good news and good days.
    Love to you and your family