15 Years

15 Years ago tonight Wendy and I were introduced to each other by Gwyn. What a 15 years, people have come and gone from our lives but never our hearts. Jobs have changed, hair has gone whiter, me not Wend, and my waist line has expanded, contracted and expanded again.

No-one prepares you for life, you just live it. Yes your action have an effect on the outcomes but I'm a big believer in fate and what goes around comes around. Friday is results day, what they're going to say is a complete unknown. But the results will be what they are and we'll deal with whatever is put in our path.

Until Friday it's really hard knowing what to say or what to do. I've been turning a bowl from some wood Gareth gave me, I don't think he knows how timely the gift was as it's occupied my mind for the best part of a month thinking about what to make and how to make it.

A bowl.

Anyhow it's finished now and I wanted Gareth and Julia to have it for their dining room. They've been just two of many many friends and neighbours to wish me and our family well for Friday. It's not the big statements that really count, sometimes a pat on the back and a well chosen word or two is just as heartening.

I had a major wobble on Sunday, just fear taking over, a fear of having come so far and yet having further yet to go. Fear of having to tell the girls bad news. Georgia and Carys are really feeling it, they shouldn't have to go through this, the pain and the uncertainty, they're kids. They should only be worrying about a boy looking at them at school or who's birthday party is next. Not worrying about their big hairy dad having a lump in his chest which could be the end of their world. No that's not fair.

They have been amazing with their strength and their capacity to care and I love them to pieces.

Right soppy stuff out of my head I'm going out on my bike to have some head space.

Happy 15 years Wend. Thank you Gwyn for the best thing that ever happened to me.